- Goes to class: Teacher repeats the same damn thing again. Nothing important happens.
- Misses one class: The cure to cancer is created, Waldo is found, AIs took over, the second coming of Jesus Christ took place and the Fire Nation attacked.
We’re so bad at sex and then we wonder why women aren’t like, really aggressive about sex. We think it’s cause they don’t have as much desire as we do. That’s how stupid men are, that we think ‘they’re just weird, women are like fucked up in the head cause they don’t wanna just fuck all the time. If I was a women, I’d just fuck everybody. Why don’t they wanna fuck all the time? I do.’ Of course you do, cause when you fuck, you get to fuck a woman! When she fucks, she has to fuck a guy! Wildly different experiences. For a man, 100% of the time, it’s the greatest thing that ever happened in his entire life. For a woman, about 40% of the time, when she’s being fucked by a guy, she’s thinking ‘I’ll get over this in a week. It’s not the worst thing. I’m not gonna cry this time.’
Oh, Louis CK, advocate for the female orgasm (via lilcrybabie)
“Another thing that proves how bad men are at sex is that after sex, you’re looking at two very different people. The man just wants to lay there, be cool and the woman wants to cuddle … ‘Why is she so NEEDY?’ She’s not needy you idiot, she’s horny, because you did nothing for her. YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. HER PUSSY IS ON FIRE BECAUSE IT’S GONE UNFUCKED COMPLETELY. Of course you’re fine, you climbed on and went ‘KFHGSKG’ and rolled off. And she’s on you because she’s like ‘WH-at SOMETHING ELSE HAS TO HAPPEN, THIS IS BULLSHIT!!’ If you fuck a woman well, she will LEAVE YOU ALONE. ‘Thanks a lot buddy, zzzzz.’
can i apologize in advance for basically everything i will ever do
the wwf’s living planet report 2014, which discovered that we’ve lost half of all the world’s wildlife in the past fourty years, showed more specifically that the population of common dormice dropped by 43 percent between 1993 and 2010.
not only are dormice vulnerable to habitat loss, but they’re hesitant to cross open fields, and the grubbing out of hedgerows in recent decades has removed the wildlife corridors between woods that has allowed the dormice to move more freely to new habitat.
dormice have very specialized diets of berries and nuts, and with less habitat they are unable to seek out enough food to fatten up before their six month hibernation (which was featured in these two posts).